The Truth Doesn't Always Set You Free
by Banana1
Summary: The fouth chapter is up in my little story on Brooke carring Lucas's child. Please RR
1. Saltwater tears

Rating: PG-13--for some language  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill or its actors and actresses.  
  
Plot: With all the spoilers going around and next week preview. I just thought, I write about how Brooke feels, when she finds out that Lucas is cheating on her with Peyton.  
  
Brooke POV  
  
He was supposed to be different, no more crap, no more finding him in bed with another girl. Instead he prove my theory, all men are slime. You can't trust a single f**king one of them; they all want better and bigger things.  
  
How could I be so stupidly blind, I had let his cute looks and his hot body distracting me. He confuses me for so long, shame on me from seeing the truth. He wanted Peyton, he was just tagging me along for sex. He tricked me in to loving him and I did. I fell so hard for him, Lucas was sweet and fun. And in the back of my mind, I could hear the small voice saying--"it's only a matter of time before he betrays you, it's only a matter of time." Why didn't I listen then, I am such a moron to believe a guy would actually love me instead of my body.  
  
I see him crossing the yard and I quickly turn to walk the other way. "Brooke!" Lucas's has this calm voice, which makes my hair stand up straight in excitement, now it just makes my stomach turn. He right on my heels now, damn it I forgot the boy plays basketball.  
  
He grabs my arm, I try to pull free but his grip is strong. "Let go of me asshole!" My shouting turns a few heads, but when the crowd sees it's me, they just turn away. No one cares what happens to me, just me all alone.  
  
"Brooke, please hear me out. Look I'm sorry that I hurt you, I didn't want any of this to happen."  
  
"No, you just wanted to sleep with me and drop me, so you and Peyton could live happily ever after. I'm right about this, arm's I Luke. You never cared about me; it was just to please Little Luke."  
  
"That not how it was at all Brooke, please you got to believe me."  
  
"Why should I? I got to hand it to you Lucas; you're a great actor you should try out for drama. You really had me believing that you actually cared for me, what just for fun you let me fall in love with you."  
  
"What? Brooke you're in love with me?" The courtyard was now deserted and Lucas still had his hand on my arm.  
  
Tears were coming to my eyes now, my mascara was running but I didn't care. "Yes, but what does it matter now--you love Peyton, she loves you. I'm just the whore who threw herself at you and you were too horny to say no right away."  
  
His blue eyes darken, but he not angry just mixed up inside "please let go of me?" I begged him. Tears are running down my face now and I can smell his aftershave; I use to love that smell. When Lucas held me in his arms at night, I could smell it on him so strongly, it made me feel safe. Now it made me feel naked and exposed, I wanted to run.  
  
Lucas grip loosens and falls to his side, "I never wanted to hurt you" he whispers his voice cracking.  
  
"Look, I understand now, I was just a stand in for Peyton. Look, go be with her be happy, just please stop doing this to me. Seeing you hurt too much." Before he can stop me, I turn and run for the parking lot. Sliding into the safety of my car, I let my head fall against the steering wheel. For what seems like hours, I just sit there letting salt-droplets wash over my cheeks. Composing myself I put the keys into the engine and bring my car to life, driving away from the pain. 


	2. Volka thy friend

Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill or its actors and actresses  
  
Told in Brooke's POV  
  
I get home to an empty house; my parents are gone--drinking martinis on some beach in Mexico. Throwing my bag onto the counter I search the liquor cabinet for some good solid vodka. Oh good, a full bottle, I forget about a cup—I'm in for drinking straight from the bottle. I drop onto the couch, turning on the television, there has to be some crappy soap on at this time of day. The cool liquid flows down my throat; it feels refreshing as it washes away my memories. The heroin on TV has just slapped her cheating husband, I give her a salute; we girls got to stick together, their arguing is the last thing I remember.  
  
My head feels funny and there this buzzing sound that pounding into my ears. Someone is trying to take my bottle from me; I fend them off with a slap of my hand.  
  
"That enough hard vodka for you today Brooke," I know that voice it belongs to a backstabbing ex best friend.  
  
"Go away bitch, haven't you done enough damage to me?" I take a swing for my bottle, I can see that there still some vodka in the bottom.  
  
"No, you had enough—I know you're mad, but getting yourself drunk is not going to help matters." She takes the bottle over to the sink and pours away my precious vodka.  
  
"I just get another one, my parents stoked up the cabinet before they left. Ha you didn't know that did you, the almighty Queen Peyton can't control everything." I laugh as the world blurs around me.  
  
"I already poured it all down the drain," I see a group of bottle all shapes empty surrounding the sink.  
  
"How dare you bitch," I jump up as I say this, but my body forces me down again. Peyton runs over to me "get away from me; I can take care of myself. You can't stop me you know I just get it somewhere else."  
  
"Brooke, I know you hate me right now, but I'm not going to sit by and watch you do this to yourself."  
  
"Too bad, why are there two of you? You know what both of you are trespassing on my property. I want you to take both of your sorry asses and get the hell out of my house." My eyes can't focus, I feel my stomach tighten. Clutching my mouth I run to the sink as the contents of my stomach come up to meet me. I can feel Peyton next to me, pulling my hair back. My stomach calms as she turns on the water, cool droplets glide down my face. I feel a wet washcloth grace my face; the room seems to be coming into focus. "I don't want you here; shouldn't you be taking care of your new boyfriend?"  
  
"You shouldn't be alone right now," her arms lead me back to the couch, all the time keeping the washcloth pressed against my forehead.  
  
"But I am alone because of the two of you, you wanted me to be alone Peyton. Why don't you leave, so your mission will be complete?" I can see my words have hurt her, good she deserves some pain to come her way.  
  
"I never wanted to hurt you, Brooke you're my best friend."  
  
"Correction, I was your best friend, now we're nothing to each other. Now will you please leave, my head is killing me and you're only making it worse." I lay my head back against the couch, closing my eyes, shutting everything out. I hear her leave, but I don't move; I just sit there as I let sleep take me over.  
  
When I wake up its dark out, the clock reading 5:30 am; my head still aches, but the pounding isn't as strong. My stomach is grumbling for something to eat, I fumble to the fridge looking inside for something eatable. I grab a strawberry yogurt, it feels good going down. I leave the empty container on the counter as I travel upstairs. Stripping off my clothes I turn the shower on full blast, stepping in I let the hot water massage my back. I wash off all the remaining after affects of yesterday, I wasn't going to let them win. I was going to take back my life, I not going to be a coward, living my life in fear of running into either one of the backstabbing cheaters.  
  
Its 6:30 am when I emerge from the bathroom, I pick out some jeans and my sapphire t-shirt with a bunch of flowers on front, I grab a back hoodie as I run downstairs. My stomach is still grumbling, I guess it wants more than a measly yogurt. Piling into my BMW, I drive around looking for a restaurant. The first place I see is Karen's Café; I'm too hungry to look anywhere else. Parking I stroll inside, Lucas isn't there (thankfully), Karen see me and smiles in my direction. I walk over to the counter and sit down.  
  
"Hey, Brooke what can I get for you to eat?"  
  
"Some strawberry pancakes sound delicious, with some toast on the side and a glass of milk would be great."  
  
"That a big breakfast this early in the morning," I guess Karen doesn't see me as the kind of girl who eats a lot of food.  
  
"I just really starving this morning," my stomach makes a loud grumble.  
  
Karen smiles, "Well in that case I should go put an APB on those pancakes," she leaves and goes into the kitchen.  
  
"Do you want some coffee while you wait?" Haley is standing behind me with a pot of coffee in her hand, my stomach tightens again.  
  
"Um no thanks Tutor Girl, I think I pass." I give her a weak smile and turn around.  
  
"Look Brooke I know we don't know each other, but I think what Lucas did to you was horrible." Haley has taken a seat residing next to me.  
  
"You and me both," I keep my eyes ahead, trying to not let the smell of coffee get to me.  
  
Haley puts the pot down, thankfully far away from me, "you going to school toady because if you aren't I could take some notes for you, I'm in two of your classes."  
  
That surprise me, but I regain myself, "You don't have to take pity on me Tutor Girl, its not the first time a guy has dump me for someone else," I try to keep the bitter out of my voice.  
  
"I'm not pitting you, I be the first one to say that what Luke did to you was a real jackass move." I turn and look at her "He my best friend but Luke is an ass sometimes, even Karen admits it—look at who his father is."  
  
I laugh, Haley was just being nice "Yeah thanks that would be really helpful, besides you owe me—I got you hooked up with Nathan."  
  
"True and I have been meaning to thank you for that. Look if you ever need someone to talk to, you know where to find me." She hoped off her stool and return to work.  
  
Five minutes later Karen came with my order, "Here a big pile of pancakes with extra strawberry topping, your toast, and a nice big glass of cold milk, enjoy." Karen walk back into the kitchen, I look around and notice how busy the place was getting. Enjoying my food I didn't notice a certain blond come in to the café.  
  
I heard his voice behind me, but he wasn't talking to me, he was directing his voice to someone else. "What is she doing here Mom?"  
  
Karen voice didn't falter "Eating some breakfast."  
  
"But, does she have to eat it here?" Lucas sounded like a five year old whining for attention.  
  
"This is my café Lucas, Brooke has the right to eat here if she wants. She is a nice girl and she was hungry, I'm not going to turn her away."  
  
"Would it be ok if I did?" my courage was crumbling and tears were gathering in my eyes.  
  
"No and I'm ashamed to hear you talk like that, I raise you to have more manners than that Lucas. Now you will leave Brooke alone or you will be the one shown the door. Go sit down over by the window and I will be back with your breakfast." Lucas didn't reply, I heard him walk over to the window. My plate clean, I drown the rest of my milk. Standing up I quickly walk over to the cash-register, pulling out my purse to pay.  
  
"That will be seven dollars and fifty cents," Haley stated. I handed her a ten, "Out of ten would be two-fifty back, thanks and please come again."  
"Thanks and could you tell Karen the pancakes were great?" I asked as I put my change in my purse.  
  
"Sure no problem, hey Brooke are you ok? You don't look to hot."  
  
"If that a crack at how crappy I look."  
  
"No I mean you look like you don't feel good, are you coming down with something?"  
  
I didn't answer because I had to grab the nearest trash can, as my breakfast made a re-entry into the world. "Maybe I am," I whisper before I threw up again.  
  
I don't remember much after that, I tend to block out when I make an ass out of myself. All I remember is Karen took me into the kitchen and sat me down; she put her hand on my forehead to check for a fever. Then she wet down a washcloth and put it against my forehead, I would be lying if I said it didn't feel good to be mother over.  
  
"Well you don't have a fever, but I think you should go home and lie down. You probably just have the stomach bug that going around, Haley will drive you home."  
  
"That's really nice of you, after I probably scared all your customers away with the fear of food poisoning."  
  
Karen laughed, (she has a great laugh) "Oh well I really didn't like this job anyway. You just go home now and get better." 


	3. Passing the Test

Okay I want to say sorry for taking so long to update, but I became busy with a new school term and for some reason my computer has been acting funky.  
  
Story: Ok since a lot has happen since I last updated the story has fast-forward. To Wish Impossible Things has already happen and Brooke has just told Lucas, that she thinks she is pregnant.  
  
He just sat there with this stupid look on his face; I wanted to scream at him to come out of this spooky trance. I could feel my body zoning out too, my mind graze over all the good times we have had together.  
  
A whisper emerges from his pouting lips, "What did you just say?"  
  
Oh please Lucas, I inwardly begging him to not make me say it again. Maybe if I didn't say anything, all of this horrible event would melt away into a bad nightmare. Maybe I had dreamt this whole crappy past few weeks with both Peyton and Lucas's betrayals or the fact that I was now with child. His eyes seize me snapping me out of my wishes. "I might be pregnant," as I say the P word my body gets this cold shiver down my spine.  
  
The first time I got pregnant, I was suppose to be married to some beautiful rich guy and he would dote on me and love me with all his heart. He was supposed to be overjoyed that we had created a life together, handing out cigars to all his buddies. Going overboard and buying a bunch of baby stuff, holding my hand straight through labor and raising a child in a loving environment.  
  
The guy I always picture was not sitting in front of me; Lucas looked as if I had just confessed a hideous crime to him. His eyes were watering and I could see his breathing was becoming irregular, as if he was grasping for breath. "So you're not 100% positive that you are indeed- -pregnant."  
  
"Maybe but I have all the signs Lucas-"  
  
"Like what for example," his voice fill with anger that scared me, I backed away. "Sorry I didn't mean it to sound like that but what are some signs?"  
  
"Well lest see I my period is late, I'm either famished or disgusted at the sight of food, and I'm constantly throwing up. I've been pretending that it's just all the leftover emotions of when you cheated on me. But tonight I just couldn't ignore it anymore; I was on my way to the hospital to see if I could take a test."  
  
"Brooke its," Lucas glance at his watch, "1:30am I think they stop doing those type of test hours ago."  
  
"Well it doesn't hurt to try and besides if they are closed for the night I can make an appointment." I couldn't stay at home all night wondering what was happening inside my body. "Look um Lucas I haven't told you this yet but--"  
  
"But what Brooke," his eyes were so full of emotion I couldn't read them.  
  
"I took one of those home pregnancy test and they all came out positive." I try to lighten the tension "I doubt we can really trust their results, I mean lots of those test are faulty and--"  
  
"Wait a minute you said all of them were positive, Brooke just how many test did you happen to take?" I mumble the word low under my breath at a super speed. "Brooke please tell me the truth, how many test did you take?"  
  
"Five, as soon as I saw the results I came looking for you."  
  
Lucas swallow as he ran a hand through his hair a lot of the color had drain from his face and his eyes were jam pack with so many emotion I couldn't keep track of them all. "You know maybe the ER could perform a test this late at night, just to make sure about the results."  
  
I nodded "Do you want to drive or should I?" We were both frazzled with worry of one simple word—positive."  
  
Lucas ended up driving; I think it was because he needed to be in control of something. Neither of us talked the whole way there; we just let the miles to the hospital get closer and closer until we arrived.  
  
We fill out the forms only talking when it was necessary, I could feel my life slipping away from me in one swift swoop. We were glued into these sutures of non movement as we waited for my number to be called.  
  
A middle age woman came out with a clipboard in hand, "Brooke Davis?" I couldn't answer her vocally; my tongue was sliding down my throat. My legs wouldn't move to any command I gave them, my stomach was rumbling with a soft samba making me dizzy. "Brooke Davis," the nurse called again she sounded annoyed.  
  
Then Lucas did something I never imagine possible; he took hold of my hand and pull me slowly up and walk me to the nurse. "I'm guessing you're Brooke Davis and you must be the boy who the reason she in here." I wanted to ask her what she meant by that. Then I thought maybe she can tell why I'm here, the dirty little secret that clung to my body making me unbalance. Maybe a lot of girls came across this nurse path with the same present I was showing off. I wanted to scream that I was so careful, that it wasn't my fault that I had let myself love him. That I had forgotten of the dangers and that I had forgotten to protect myself from this moment.  
  
She motion us inside, I was thankful for the support Lucas's body gave me. He hadn't let go of my hand since he seized it what seemed like hours ago. I remember how I use to feel when the slightest touch of Lucas made my skin feel like fire.  
  
The nurse looked at her chart, "Ok it says you're here for a pregnancy test, do you think you could go the bathroom right now enough for a urine test?" I shook my head, I felt dry like the Arabian Desert, and Lucas's hand was still present in mine, "I guess we have to do a blood test then." She rub some cleaning solution on my left arm, then I felt the prick of the needle, cool and silent it enter my body taking what it wanted. "All right I will run this to the lab and they should have the results in an hour or two." She left us then to be alone with our thoughts. I don't know how but sleep overcame my body and I drifted off into an unknown darkness.  
  
I awoke to the same nurse gently shaking me awake, I turn to look at Lucas but found that he had fallen asleep as well. It didn't escape my notice that his hand was still in mine. "Are those the results of my---my test?"  
  
"Yes, do you want to wake your young man, so you both can hear the news?" I shook Lucas awake; I wasn't going to hear the results alone.  
His eyes became full alert as soon as he remembered where we were. "Are those the results?"  
  
The nurse nodded, "I just got done telling your girlfriend that." I wanted to explain her that Lucas was not my boyfriend, but I kept my mouth shut. "Brooke the test came out positive, you're pregnant." 


	4. A Connection Between Two Comrades

Disclaimer: Don't own One Tree Hill or any of the characters.  
  
Author Note: Sorry about the long time without an update. I just been very busy and haven't had the time to dive into Brooke's head.  
  
I wish life could be like a VCR, I could fast forward through the parts that scare me or that royally piss me off. Rewind the happiest moments that fill my life with complete bliss. Or hell I even just settle for a pause button, one so I can contemplate what going on when I'm emotionally kicked on my ass.  
  
I was given a bunch of pamphlets on the child living inside of me. All I saw was the different colors that danced before me as Lucas look them over. I'm alone now; Lucas is off talking to someone on the phone. He told me who he was talking to once, but the buzzing in my ears drowned him out. The motherly nurse figure pop up to check I haven't become a shell. But she is already too late, I was a shell before all this even happen, I played the part of a shell my whole life.  
  
Her husky voice began talking "I got pregnant when I was seventeen, my boyfriend wanted to look cool in front of friends and I wanted to piss off my uptight father." I look up at her; it seems as if telling me this part of her history has shed ten years off her face.  
  
I turn on my side wanting to know more, "What happen?"  
  
"Oh he abandoned me, changing diapers and bottle feeding wasn't high on his list. I was left to raise my son by myself until I met the wonderful man who became my husband." She pours me a glass of water and then fluffs my pillow.  
  
My stomach slightly turns, as the cool water went down, "Did you ever think about an abortion?"  
  
"Oh it wasn't legal back then and the ones you could get weren't exactly safe. I thought about adoption, I even went to an adoption agency to get some information. Everything was so surreal and then it happened." Her eyes were glaze over now as she let her soul recall the past for my benefit.  
  
I lean in close and whisper, "What was it?"  
  
"I saw a teenage girl just like me; she was talking to an interviewer. He collected all her information and she sat down next to me. We talk for a little bit about life and then she asks me something I never forget." I lean in, begging to learn this miraculous question that answers all this nurse's questions about her unseen future. "Do you want to feel the baby kick?"  
  
She stops because she must have seen my eyes cloud over with confusion. "I felt the new life that was maturing inside of her and I realized that my baby was doing the same exact thing just inside of me. I wasn't content with harboring a new life in my body and then just sending him off into the unknown. Right then I knew I wanted to see his life after his birth, see him play baseball, learn how to ride a bike, go to college, maybe even get married. I thanked her for the talk and walk out to my new life with my son."  
  
My mouth opens before I could think, "So no regrets?"  
  
She smiles, "No, no regrets, only a son who has made my life complete. I need to check on the other patients, if you need anything just ask for Mabel." With that she was gone, I lean back into the stiff hospital pillow and fell into a restless sleep.  
  
Where drums could be heard in the distance and I saw myself in a rocking chair sitting next to a crib and holding a small bundle in my arms. I was even singing although it was badly off-key, I found myself standing next to the dream version of me, about to look into the bundle-  
  
"Brooke time to wake up," Lucas gently shook me awake. I rub the sleep grid out of my eyes, "the hospital needs the bed for a new patient, come on I take you home now."  
  
I look at him as I softly rub my stomach, "Could you take me to Peyton's house please?" 


End file.
